pork rinds have become synonymous with healthy eating. huh? no, really. with all the atkins converts running around losing pounds and pounds off themselves (not half realising it’s water weight), all this low carb stuff has really gotten everywhere. in the U.S. they’re selling burgers without the buns. so they’re just selling patties of meat. it’s like, selling a salad without the greens—it’s just dressing and bacon bits, but yum.

anyway, people in singapore aren’t that familiar with pork rinds, for a couple of reasons. one, they sound rather strange, like pig cartilage. or duck tongue. have you eaten that? i haven’t, but they look foul. two, we don’t need processed pork rinds flown from the U.S. to us, because we have our own versions at the local bak kwa shops. fried with no fat, fried with a little fat, fried with some fat and pork floss, fried with chilli, fried in their own fat, fried in healthier vegetable oil, fried and put on a bun, fried, fried, fried.

so the reason why these things have been regarded as healthy is because they’re low carb. that’s because they’re HIGH FAT. come on. they’re like, 99.9% fat, 0.01% protein, leaving no room in the makeup for carbs. the sad truth about atkins cult members is that they’d sooner drink a pot of oil than eat a wheat biscuit.

and one day, your doctor tells you you’re 80% cholestrol, and you’re shocked, because all you’ve eaten for the past 3 years is pork rinds and you can’t imagine why you’re not healthy.

what surprises me, i guess, is that people still need proper, medical explanations for why pork rinds isn’t healthy.

following my recent upgrade to a new and better guitar, i started digging out old songs that i used to play—songs that i’ve listened to and liked enough to play, enough to record for people and so on. well you know how these things are. digging out songs led to digging out covers i’ve recorded, which led to digging out original songs written, which led to the growing pile of half-songs that i didn’t have enough inspiration or talent to complete.

which led to the inspirations behind them all, to the memories, to the songs that trigger senseless and random floating emotions. and soon i’ll find myself kneeling in the rain outside for no apparent reason crying, “why, why, why!”

but i should really get back to those songs. i dug out a mixtape as well, one that i had made for someone. clearly i didn’t give it away, or i wouldn’t have it.

why yes, i do realise i am a very clever person.

either way, i played it, and every song (if i may say so myself) was so well-chosen, so emotive, so deep—or so i would have people believe, at least before getting to know me better—and then suddenly “banana phone” comes on.

wha…?

maybe that’s why i didn’t give this mixtape away.