“1 alezbian, 2 alezbians”
 |
| Chinese New Year lighting. Everywhere. |
Funny how the littlest thing makes all the difference to your day. With the longish weekend Chinese New Year break over, it’s back to work today and I’ve just discovered how to prop the back support of my office chair up higher so that I get a pseudo boss chair, and that’s made me the happiest camper for the foreseeable morning ahead. Or whatever’s left of it.
The break over the weekend was great, I’m sure most will agree, but thankfully won’t be as pound-packing as I had expected, because I mysteriously lost my apetite for the huge variety of New Year goodies that usually gets shoved in my face. I also not-so-mysteriously lost my apetite after the incessant rounds of “When it your turn?” and “Sooo… Got a boyfriend?”, and I digress.
Somehow, Chinese New Year boils us down and returns us to our most basic nature of eating and copulation, because all people care about is scoffing down pastries and candies and obsessing over who-with/why-them/for-how-long you’ve been… copulating.
It’s always easier for the guys, let’s just get that straight. If you’re a single girl, people look at you with pity and pat you on the shoulder, saying, “It’s okay, soon, hmm?” but if you’re a guy, they look at you with a mix of envy and awe, because you must be single in the light of your infinite hotness and Player lifestyle. And if you’re older, it’s still okay, because you’re viewed as either (a) an old, still-hot Player or (b) gay.
Which means people will still look at you with that mix of envy and awe, because both mean you still got it, just that you appeal to opposite genders. Or that they appeal to you… Hmm. Pedant.
But if you’re female, single and older, then you’re (a) pathetic, (b) sad, (c) left on the shelf (d) gay or (e) all of the above. So people look at you with that same sympathy because you’re a “speenster” and/or (and this, usually said in hushed, scandalised tones) “alezbian”.
On that note, I actually thought that it was spelt “alesbian” when I was a kid, because of the way people talked about it. “Oooh, she’s alesbian,” they’d say; so in my mind, it was “1 alesbian, 2 alesbians”.
But yeah, that essentially summarised my Chinese New Year. That, and the massive Steamboat (Hotpot in other Westernised countries) Avalanche—I had two on consecutive nights, so I’m going to go for a burger at lunch later, to choke off the supply of healthy, tasteless food at once—and the great ten-minute firework show over the Esplanade on the eve of the first day (Chinese New Year being not one day but 15). We were up on the roof of a nearby restaurant, and it literally took my breath away.
Fireworks. I really need to get me a new digital camera soon.
Be thankful you don’t have an aunt who works for SDU, which I do. Thankgoodness I managed to avoid her this year. But the year before last was terrible as she was actively ’selling’ membership and dregging up questions about the Ex. It’s a pity…she was one of my favorite aunts..
I love how they speak of speenster and alezbian with the same tones as runaway/ good for nothing/ cohabitator/ pitiful soul.
On a more disturbing note, when I read “1 alezbian, 2 alezbian”, I had a vision of cookie monster saying that.
ive got spam comments(porn links etc) left on my blog!
how do i prevent that!!??
Cy> Hiya, I took a quick peek at your blog (cute pics BTW) and, no offence, but I can see why this problem is occurring. Spammers just love to catch certain keywords on blog posts.
The good news is that you’re using Wordpress which provides quite a few methods to cut down on Spam. The best way I have found is to go to Options>Discussion and check all three options under the heading “Before a comment appears”
This makes sure that No comments will automatically appear until you verify it personally.
If that seems a little heavy-handed, then only check the bottom two options of the three. You have to verify a few posts from your regular readers at first, but after that their comments should automatically go through.
Hope that helps!
popagandhi> shouldn’t that be The Count doing that?
“One! One alezbian!”
“Two! Two alezbians!”
“Three! Three alezbians!”
*Thunder sounds and lightning flashes*
“Yes! Yes! ah ha ha ha!”
“oh that reminds me, time to go get the camera…”
oh right, you know i was never paying attention to sesame st..
Popagandhi> really? I loved sesame st. electric co and Square 1 was good too. All pale when compared to the wonder that was The Muppet Show of course.
Anyway, both Cookie Monster and The Count where personal favs so that’s why I can tell the difference.
“COOOKIE!!” *Ah!! gobble gobble, mash, smack, munch munch munch*
And here we have more “that strange aunt who….” scenarios. Anyhoo. I stared at your “1 alezbian 2 alezbians” title and spent a good minute trying to figure out what this strange word that sounded remarkably like “a lesbian” was. I was on the verge of googling it when I decided that reading your entry might have been easier. Duh.
Falchion> I think I preferred cartoons and SBC dramas then.. only caught on to sesame st remarkably late in life. I was so deprived. Sigh.
Popagandhi> Oh don’t get me started on the cartoons of my youth. Transformers, MASK, Saber Rider, Centurions, Robotech, Visionaries, Starcon, Jace $ the Wheeled Warriors. AHHHH! I want them all on DVD.
Espeically Centurions. My all time fav. Crystal Kane is such a babe (hence my favorite female name was cemented in my young mind)
Falchion> I hope it’s Crystal… Not Kane. Bahaha. I watch WWE, so that has extra significance.
w> … ‘cos of you, I googled “alezbian”, too.
vicki> yes it’s Crystal not Kane *rolls eyes*. I would name my daugther Crystal if it weren’t for the fact that all the Crystal’s I know would get the wrong idea. My future wife too.
As for Kane, he still has the coolest ring entrance in WWE. Who else has pryotechnics tied to the rings posts for Every show? WWE needs to go back to Kane beating up on HHH again. The unmasking angle was totally bad. Hopefully Kane gets to do something in the upcoming (for us) Royal Rumble. At the very least throw both Chris Masters and Carlito out of the ring. Now That…thats kewl.
Frankly I still like ‘Taker..
i missed you and was worried about where you were - happy chinese new year my love; i miss you so much. come online more ok?
jody> I’ll mail you later okay. I miss you too…
Fal> i get spams like; 1) Buy viagra 2) travel to germany, australia, etc 3) buy wedding ring 4) home equity loans
does that mean i’ve got lot of stuff that i cant post?
wah, that’s maddness!
Cy> not really…spam is a problem for everyone on the internet. It’s just a matter of time before it hits. Frankly I believe that we shouldn’t have to restrict what we write just because we might attract Spam. Which is why some comment spam control needs to be in place. Like the steps I mentioned above.
what version is your Wordpress by the way?
Doesn’t Akismet (in wordpress 2.0 on) work for those of you wiht problems with spam?
A very good point. To be honest, I haven’t upgraded my own Wordpress to 2.x as of yet, because I heard of various bugs. And lo, Wordpress 2.1 comes out after only a month. Most likely I will be upgrading my blogs to Wordpress 2.1 soon
You should try it. The new version of wp is actually 2.0.1, mostly bug fixes and changes to the rich editors and image uploading in the administrative panel (rather than to functionality or to the end user). it kicks ass. akismet works very well too! i ran away from wp cos of the spam.. now akismet solves that problem, and i’m back. =)
i feel left out from the inner circle of love. i miss you two too.
two too.
how come i got referrals to my blog from this particular post? :|
jacq> Probably, the last couple of people reading my blog were reading comments to this post, and clicked on your name (or several others) after to exit. Don’t think too much about it. Haha. :D