Get Thee in a Corner, Hoverer
Now I know why two out of three times I go to the toilet, the seat is wet—all you women have been hovering and sprinkling all over the place.
But fear not, for the rest of us who make some contact with the seat. I have an important tip: based on Very Scientific Test methods, I found that because of the disdain with which most people hold the first cubicle (due to assumptions that is it the closest to the entrance and therefore most frequented), this means it is ironically the least used. And most likely, the cleanest. So chances are, you’ll have more luck with the first cubicle, if you get squeamish about yellow water on the seat.
Strangely, many hoverers are squeamish about that. I don’t understand; if you’re hovering anyway, what does it matter what’s on the seat? Can someone say ‘double standards’?
On that note, I wish there were a rule making hoverers hover over the same bowl…If you’re already sprinkling, we might as well lump you people together.
Nooooo now my 1st cubicle will never be clean again! Damn you.
Anyhoo, I’m surprised that anyone actually voted for squatting. I finally understand why there have been times when I’ve walked into toilets and found pee POOLING in the back of the upturned SEAT COVER. Na bei. EVEN IF YOU WANT TO SQUAT ON THE SEAT, MUST YOU REALLY FACE THE WALL?
Failing that, learn to bloody AIM will you.
u’re probably quite accurate with your 1st cubicle theory. The hypothesis stands only when the PEE factor is in play.
When the PEE changes to S h i t aka “emergency stomach ache thus i’ve gotta use the loo quick”, the seat in the 1st cubicle is usually the worst choice. How I know? By rushing into the 1st cubicle whenever I’ve got a really bad tummy ache, feeling that my bowels are really loose and out of control… and then get turned off by the sight of that SPLATTERED, SPRAYED & GLUED human waste all over the back of the bowl. Yucks.
I usually join the queue again. I can’t shit knowing there’s shit right behind me. Eeeks.